Forgiveness

Genesis 50:15-21

Beverly Weinhold

 

In the summer of 2006, the Boston globe featured a story entitled “German Minister Issues an Apology.”  Heidemarie Zuel, Minister of Development offered an admission of guilt and a heartfelt apology on behalf of German troops who killed 65,000 people in the Namibian genocide in 1904.  These were her words:  I am painfully aware of the atrocities committed.  We Germans accept our historical and moral responsibility.  So in the words of the Lords prayer, I ask you to forgive us our debts.

 

Most of us sitting here have never been victimized by mass murder.  But no doubt all of us can identify with wanting to forgive a wrongdoer or needing forgiveness ourselves. Forgiveness is not an easy thing.  It may be the most difficult and least understood challenge every human being faces.  It shapes how we see others, and ourselves and even effects how we relate nation to nation.  Throughout the ages the major faith traditions have put a premium on forgiveness. For Christians, forgiveness is a centerpiece.  From the Old Testament story of Joseph forgiving his brothers for selling him into slavery to Jesus asking God to forgive those who crucified him—forgiveness is the expectation of our faith but rarely the reality.  Many of us want to forgive, but we don’t know how to begin. 

 

Undoubtedly the Joseph of our scripture story this morning felt the same way.  When he was 17, his brothers betrayed him, brutalized him and left him in a pit for dead. But God was with him. A passerby pulled him out and sold him into slavery to a wealthy man named Potiphar.  But Joseph’s troubles weren’t over. Potiphar’s wife had an eye for Joseph and when he refused her advances she accused him of sexual assault. It became a matter of ‘he said,’ ‘she said’ and Joseph landed in jail. But God was with him. No matter how many times his perpetrators tried to paint him into a corner he rose to the top like crème. Finally Joseph gained prestige when he interpreted a dream for the Pharaoh of Egypt, a position not unlike our President of the United States. The Pharaoh was so taken with Joseph’s character, charisma and qualities that he made him his right hand man over all Egypt. His appointment was none too soon as the known world of Joseph’s time suffered a severe famine.  But because of his extraordinary stewardship abilities, Egypt was the only place where food could be found. People from north, south, east and west came to Egypt bartering and begging for food. Joseph’s long lost brothers were among the beggars, standing before him after 30 long years. Would he forgive them? Could he forgive them?  Should he forgive them? Or would he like Ivan in Dostoevsky’s novel, wonder “who could ever forgive such men?”

 

Joseph’s question is your question. Joseph’s question is my question. Should we forgive such people?  The Christian gospel says we should.  Jesus says we should. Psychologist and Theologian Lewis Smedes says we should. Listen to his words:  The only way to heal the pain that will not heal itself is to forgive the person who hurt you. Forgiveness is not a choice among many options, it’s the only option.  It’s the only remedy that will heal the hurt.  But even when we want to forgive, how do we take the first step?

I. 

Let me suggest that the first step on the journey toward forgiveness is to rediscover the humanity of the one who hurt us.  When people harm us, we begin to objectify them.  We downsize them to their actions.  They become ‘doings’ rather than ‘beings.’ If Charlie is unfaithful to his wife, we call him “that adulterer.”  If Betty lies to her best friend, we refer to her as “a liar.”  We pigeon hole people.  We put labels on them and they become those labels. And without knowing it, we strip them of their humanity. We need God’s grace to remember that all of us are created in God’s image.  And because we rebelled, we are a mysterious mixture of good and bad.  May we rediscover our perpetrator’s humanity as this child did in the ‘40’s from Ravensbrook Concentration Camp. This was the prayer that was found pinned inside the victims clothing:

 

O Lord, remember not only the men and women of good will but also those of ill will.  But do not remember all of the suffering they have inflicted upon us.  Instead remember the fruits we have born because of this suffering, our fellowship, our loyalty, our humility, our courage, our generosity, the greatness of heart that has grown from this trouble. When our persecutors come to be judged by you, let all these fruits that we have born be their forgiveness.

II.

Like this little boy, Joseph rediscovered his brother’s humanity when he said in scripture, Dont be afraid. For, am I in God’s place? You mean it for evil, but God meant it for good.  But rediscovering the humanity of those who hurt us is not enough. Next we need to surrender the right to get even. This could be the hardest part, because there are times when revenge seems so right. A popular novelist put it this way, Sweet revenge! Don’t just get even, get everything!  We feel this way particularly about people who feel no remorse for what they did.  After all, shouldn’t they pay?  Shouldn’t someone hold them accountable?  Yes, someone should.  But we aren’t the Someone. It is precisely at this point that we need to parse the difference between our revenge and God’s justice.   Revenge is human pleasure at seeing another person squirm while justice is God’s holiness holding a person accountable. Pope John Paul nuanced that difference when he forgave the man that took a shot at him:  Forgiveness lies in the human heart,” he said, “but the criminal must spend time in Caesar’s jail.  There are always consequences to sin and when we surrender the right to get even we effectually get out of God’s way to do God’s work. That was St. Paul’s point when he quoted this verse to the Romans: Vengeance is mine says the Lord. I will repay.  If your enemy is hungry feed him.  If he is thirsty, give him a drink.  Don’t be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

III.

Paul’s point was the essence of Joseph’s words to his brothers when he said: Don’t be afraid. Am I in God’s place?  Despite the abuse that he had suffered he surrendered his right to get even. He trusted in God’s justice to balance the books.  Joseph let go of all grudges.  But the journey wasn’t over.  He had to go the extra mile.  He had to wish them well.  Jesus references this in the New Testament gospels when he says, Bless those who persecute you.  Bless and curse not. Joseph was wishing them well, he was blessing his brothers when he said in today’s scriptures: So therefore, do not be afraid, I will provide for you and your little ones.  So he comforted them and spoke kindly to them. 

 

Wishing someone well that has hurt us is where the rubber hits the road.  You see, we can forgive with the head but it hasn’t really penetrated the heart. A woman that I know well says this same thing.  She thought that she had forgiven her husband for walking out on their family after struggling for seven long years. But when she got the news that he was remarried all the anger and pain came flooding forward. It was hard enough to see him looking 10 years younger and making more money.  But now, he not only had a new life, he had a new wife. She had forgiven him in her head, but now she needed to forgive him in her heart. God was calling her like Joseph to go the extra mile.  She must wish him well.

 

Conclusion

I choose to speak on the subject of forgiveness on this second Sunday of Lent because I agree with Martin Luther that forgiveness is the centerfold of the Christian faith.  It is why Christ spent 40 days in the wilderness contemplating the cost his crucifixion on the cross. Christians believe that Christ purchased humankind’s forgiveness on Good Friday’s cross. After a criminal had paid his debt to society in 1st century Jerusalem, a writ of forgiveness was nailed to the city wall.  “Paid in full” it said, hanging there for all to see.  In the same way, when Jesus paid the debts of humankind, he was nailed to the cross.  “Paid in full,” his life said…hanging there for all to see.  It is this amazing grace that goads us to get up out of the pit and go and forgive our perpetrators.

 

 Heidemarie Zuel, Minister of Development in Germany, beseeched the Namibians, In the words of the Lord’s Prayer, I ask you to forgive us our debts.  And every Sunday morning we pray, Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. Can we forgive?  Will we forgive?  Should we forgive?  The Old Testament says that we should.  Jesus says that we should.  And so does Lewis Smedes.  Listen to his words:  Forgiving, stops the reruns of pain.  Forgiving heals the memory.  When you release the wrongdoer from the wrong you are released from another’s power over you.  You set a prisoner free only to find that the real prisoner was you.  Amen.