July 10, 2005

Remedy for Complaining

Exodus 16:2-15
Ephesians 4:17-25
John 6:25-35

"The whole congregation of the Israelites complained against Moses ..." Today we're going to talk about the fine art of complaining, bellyaching, muttering, murmuring, something we all do from time to time, but deplore in others. We say, "Why does Jack always have to disagree with everything," or "All Judy ever does is complain, complain, complain." We may use other descriptive words for such complaining, but I won't repeat them here. We see negativism in others, but often overlook our own. We may think we have a perpetually cheery disposition and good sense of humor - but I'll bet few of us would be as sanguine as the philosopher, Socrates, who one day got quite a scolding from his wife. She berated him full force with scornful words and gestures - I have no idea what he did to cause such a fuss - but in fact she was so irate, that she ended up dumping a bucket of water over the philosopher's head. It didn't phase him. He merely commented that after so much thunder and lightning, he was expecting a shower. (i)

Whether we identify with Socrates or with his wife, most of us will have to admit that at times we also indulge in complaining or other such grumbling. It's natural to mutter when things don't go our way, but unless we're conscious of such a complaining tendency, we could become unpleasant and difficult persons. Like the woman who one foggy morning left her car lights on after she parked it (in the days when car lights did not go off automatically after a minute), and another commuter noticed and called to her from across the street to alert her. She returned to her car, turned off the lights, and then as she and a companion went on their way, she was overheard muttering, "I can see that it's going to be one of those days when everything goes wrong!" Not a word of thanks to the person who'd spared her a run-down battery. And not a thought about how maybe it was going to be a good day, because she'd already received a favor from a stranger. (ii)

The people of Israel also complain. They are a dissatisfied, griping bunch of folks, and Moses and Aaron really have their hands full. It isn't enough that Moses has bargained with Pharaoh to let go of his oppressive yoke upon the people; or that he has safely led them through the Red Sea; or that he has been their faithful guide in the wilderness. They are definitely not happy campers; food is scarce, though it's probably adequate, and they're afraid they'll starve to death. "You're going to kill this whole assembly with hunger," they cry out. "When we were in Egypt we ate our fill of bread." How quickly they've forgotten the terrible living conditions they left behind, the many hardships, including hunger, they endured. And, they are overlooking the blessings they now have - freedom, and a chance for a new beginning, and at least enough food to survive. Their cravings are excessive - they want more than what they really need. In a word, they are greedy.

But Moses, wise person that he is, recognizes a deeper significance to the people's complaining. It's not against him or his brother that they are grumbling; it's against God! They are lacking faith in God, not trusting that God will deliver them as before. More than complaining, they are denying the reality of God in their midst, forsaking the faith of their forbearers. And I'll bet some of us can identify, right? At times we've cried out, "O God, if there is a God, why did you let this happen?" That's a tough place to be.

There's another attitude we sometimes have that sounds like that of the Israelites - the attitude of pessimism, looking at the world through gray-colored or cloudy glasses, rather than through the clearness of reality. This is an attitude that impairs our vision, an attitude that says, "everything's always against me." We come to believe that if we drop a piece of toast, it will land butter side down; if a single fly is buzzing in a restaurant, it will land in our soup. Some people call this "Murphy's Law" - if anything can go wrong, it will. Some of us truly believe that the cards are stacked against us, that we can't win, or change, or improve ourselves. It's a defeatist attitude that often results in constant complaining, because something is always wrong. We are dissatisfied with life and with ourselves. A cartoon shows a doctor saying with great solemnity to a patient, "This is very serious; I'm afraid you are allergic to yourself." (iii) Sometimes we're our own worst enemies, aren't we?

Sometimes such pessimism can lead to a general feeling of powerlessness, resulting in avoidance of responsibilities. The external forces seem so huge that we feel powerless, and thus we do nothing. An example of such a feeling is the reaction of many of us to such global issues as world hunger, the war in Iraq, the activities of terrorists, as this week in London, concerns about the environment, etc. In the face of such overwhelming things we feel powerless. We also feel powerless at the escalating cost of gasoline, the gyrations of the stock market, and many personal family problems. Complaining at such times seems like the only viable option.

But the title of this sermon is "Remedy for Complaining," so since we've diagnosed this rather universal malady, let's see what the doctor prescribes. Actually, rather than one single remedy for complaining, I'd like to suggest several possible remedies; there are many medicines at the pharmacy to cure an upset stomach. To carry this metaphor one step further, let's first get our priorities straight. Let's think less about our stomachs and our physical needs, and more about our souls. For most of us who live in the affluent suburbs, our physical needs for food, shelter, clothing, for example, are not as great as they are for others in the world. But many of us spend much time and energy worrying about and complaining about what really are the most inconsequential things - how we measure up against our neighbors or our peers in terms of the number and kinds of possessions we have; our relative status compared to others; the groups we belong to; the weather; our health (which for most of us is far better than most folks in the world); the kind of food we eat - not that any of us are malnourished. We crave, we are greedy for "food" in quotation marks - those things that are perishable, that represent illusory values, transitory pleasures and comforts. We need to get our priorities straight.

Second, we need to take a hard look at our faith - and be consciously aware of it. This means we have to delve deeper into our faith, and let our faith work for us every day, in every situation. It is a sign of outright unbelief when the people in the wilderness rise up against Moses. The cause of their complaining is not lack of food, nor poor leadership, but their own lack of faith. We need to constantly rekindle and nourish our faith in God's providence - that's one of the main reasons we come together as people of God every Sunday. It is not Moses who gives the people the quails and the manna; it is God who provides, perhaps through nature. The true miracle is that the people discover a means of subsistence where they haven't known it before. God, through the creation, gives bread, and from God also comes the only true bread of life that sustains all who believe. Jesus is saying in effect that it's the power of God's love that is the underlying reality in the universe, the life-giving force in creation. Once we're aware of this, or remind ourselves about it, then it will be easier to trust God day by day. When we pray, "give us this day our daily bread," we are asking for nothing more than the portion due us every day, nothing more, and trusting in God to continue to provide in the future as God has in the past.

We are of course not passive observers in this process, but are empowered by God to be partners in creation and re-creation. We have some responsibilities for ourselves and for others. We begin by acknowledging who we are, and by accepting our own shortcomings. We need to recognize our sins and not let them get to the point as described by Paul in Ephesians when our hearts are so hardened that we're not even aware that we're sinning; when we're so filled with our desires that we don't care who we hurt, including ourselves. After acknowledging who we are, including being aware of our sins, we need to ask for God's help in removing our sins. Paul says, "Put away your former way of life ..." or as in an older translation, "Put off your old nature." Like dirty old clothes, take off that which is weighing you down, and "clothe yourselves with the new self" - godliness, holiness, righteousness. This may sound unattainable, but it's not, and simply put, this is the mandate of faith: to believe, look within, resolve to change what needs changing, pray for help, and then take the help when it's offered. This also includes being receptive to God's guidance and direction, true for personal issues as well as the more global issues we mentioned before. For example, we who have full stomachs cannot say to the other 2/3's of the world: "Stop thinking about your stomachs, and start thinking about your souls." We've got to fill those stomachs first!

Finally, a good remedy for complaining is the opposite of what we talked earlier, rather than pessimism, an optimistic attitude about life. Persistent pessimism is related to a lack of trust in God. Likewise optimism, or an attitude of hopefulness, is living life while trusting in God. Maybe we won't all be as good natured as old Socrates, but a sense of humor, a looking on the positive side of things rather than the negative helps. Dad comes home from the office, takes one look at his wife who's been home all day with the kids, and he says, "Oh boy, you've got that disaster-look all over your face. Something bad's happened, hasn't it?" She nods affirmatively. "Well, don't give me any bad news. I've had a terrible day. I just want to hear good news." "Sure," she replies. "We have five beautiful children, right?" He agrees. "Well, four of them did not break an arm today." (iv)

This isn't exactly looking at the world through rose-colored glasses, but it sure beats the cloudy kind, and it sure beats complaining. No matter what our situation, there is usually always some good, some blessing that results. For sure, there are no guarantees in life - rain falls on the just and the unjust - and it does no good to try to bargain with God for a preferred place under the umbrella. And yet, God does not forsake us; God's will, worked in many mysterious and not so mysterious ways, is for goodness, wholeness, and love for all. It's up to us to respond by choosing the best remedy for those times when we'd rather complain.

Hopefully we can all be like the young Italian peasant girl immortalized by Robert Browning. She was a hard worker, who put in long hours at strenuous labor. But as Browning tells about her, she walked through the town early in the morning with these words on her lips: "The year's at the spring, and day's at the morn; morning's at seven; the hillside's dew-pearled; God's in his heaven - all's right with the world!" (v) I hope your world is all right today, and all this week. But if not, please, no complaining! Amen.

The Pilgrim Church of Duxbury
Rev. Kenneth C. Landall

i Pulpit Resource, 8/19/79.
ii Christian Science Monitor, quoted in PR.
iii Harry Emerson Fosdick, "On Being a Real Person," p. 26.
iv Pulpit Resource, op. cit.
v Ibid.