September 11, 2005

Forgiveness Unlimited

Genesis 50:15-21
Romans 14:5-12
Matthew 18:21-35

It is great for our church family to be back together again after what I hope was a good summer for all of you. Yet as we gather here today, two events, one in our past and the other in the present, hang over us like a funeral pall. Exactly four years ago today the awful terrorist attacks on our country occurred, precipitating even more violence in various forms in the intervening years. We said four years ago that our nation would probably never be the same again. It is not. We mourn the lives of Americans lost that day and hold them and their families in our hearts and in our prayers. We mourn the lives of Americans, Iraqis, and others in the Mideast lost to the continuing violence over there. At times the number of casualties is overwhelming. May our prayers for peace be heard.

And now we have the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. The destruction and suffering has been beyond imagining. Yet folks are rallying to help; some of the emails I've gotten from those on the scene down there are heart-warming; and you know of some of the efforts here. We mourn the loss of life, the disruption of lives, and the destruction of neighborhoods and communities. And we pray, God make us instruments of your healing, and help us bring hope to those who feel hopeless. May these prayers also be heard.

While remembering and mourning, and still considering our responses to neighbors in need as we talked last week, I want us to consider another theological issue today, forgiveness, something we receive in abundance from God, and that God expects us to show to others. We willingly and gladly receive God's forgiveness and are reminded of it each time we pray the Lord's Prayer. But it's the second part of that phrase in the prayer that causes us trouble: "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." Forgiving others is not easy. The story of Joseph and his brothers will help us focus.

The story begins with an obnoxious teenager who so infuriates his older brothers with his fanciful dreams and flaunting his beautiful coat given to him by daddy, that they conspire to do him in. They toss him in an open pit and leave Joseph as a snack for the wild beasts, but he is rescued from his would-be-grave by a group of traveling salesmen passing by, who end up bringing him to Egypt, where after a number of incredible events, he eventually becomes the Number 2 man in the kingdom, second only to the Pharaoh.

A devastating famine sweeps across the land of Canaan and Joseph's brothers go to Egypt in search of food. They come to Joseph, who recognizes them, but they don't realize who he is because he's wearing a fancy uniform and is speaking Egyptian. Eventually he tells them who he is and they all cry on one another's shoulders. Everything's fine until their father, Jacob, dies, and then the brothers start feeling anxious. Generous and forgiving as Joseph has been, the brothers are concerned that now that dad's not around to put in a good word for them, will Joseph continue to be as gracious as he has been? He may decide to pay them back as they know they deserve. (i) If anyone ever had the right to not be forgiving, it's Joseph.

But Joseph does something unexpected. He says to them in so many words, "Do not be scared. You don't have to grovel before me as if I were God. You intended evil, but God has brought good out of that evil. But don't worry. I forgive you." Over the length of the Joseph story a transformation occurs in him, in the one who was a self-centered, brash, bragging, tattling, snotty-nosed kid, but who becomes, by God's grace, a generous, noble, forgiving person. And in addition, the scheming, conniving, downright mean and evil brothers do not get what they deserve, but are lovingly taken care of by the one who has every reason to do the complete opposite.

As we reflect on this great story, and also remember Jesus' words about our forgiving others, not just once or twice, not seven times, but seventy-seven times, or as an alternate translation has it, "seventy times seven," which is to say forgiveness unlimited, let's ask two brief questions: what is forgiveness all about? and, why should we forgive?

We've already discovered one clue into what forgiveness is all about - it's contrary to what we expect. Think about what society teaches us to do when we've been wronged by another - and it surely is not turn the other cheek, or forgive and forget. We're taught that we've got to stand up for our rights. If someone hits you, literally or figuratively, hit 'em back. We know the expression, "I don't get mad, I get even." Vengeful revenge is a constant theme on TV and in movies. Animosity, grudges, and resentment are part of many relationships marred by unforgiving attitudes. Society says: "Give 'em what they deserve; forgiveness is a sign of weakness." But the Bible teaches: "Give 'em what they don't expect; forgiveness is a sign of strength."

Forgiveness is often unexpected good news. A variety store in a recession-wracked New England town a number of years ago, advertised that it would forgive the debts of some 1,200 of its customers, a loss to the store of many thousands of dollars. "Start fresh with us," the ad announced, really incredible and news-worthy, considering that not many people say, "I mean to do business by forgiveness." (ii)

Forgiveness is also life-transforming, causing change in an often radical way. I heard about a Rev. Walt Everett, whose son was murdered years ago by a man high on drugs. At first Everett felt vengeful and angry. But slowly he started changing. Eventually by getting to know the murderer through prison visits, he not only forgave him, but ultimately conducted his wedding. This is amazing grace, indeed! Not only were both these lives changed, but hearing such a story, challenges us to change as well. (iii) This is the kind of transforming power forgiveness can have, a transformation like Joseph and his brothers experienced.

When we're able to forgive another and when we're forgiven, often a huge burden is lifted from us. A young man years before said something to his father that caused him to be deeply hurt. For years the matter went unresolved, but the guilt and remorse kept gnawing away at the son. Finally he writes his dad a letter, reviewing the incident, not even sure his father will remember it, and he asks him for forgiveness. A few days later he receives this reply: "My dear son, of course I remember, and of course I forgive you." It's like a great weight has been lifted off the son's shoulders, making all the difference in his life. The real payoff, however, comes many years later after both his parents have died. In the process of going through their belongings (my sister and I did this a month ago with my mother's keepsakes - a very emotional experience), but as the son in our story is going through his parents' treasures, he discovers the letter he had written to his dad. He opens it and begins to reread it, and with tears running down his cheeks, he turns it over, and there in his father's handwriting is one word: Forgiven and it is underlined! Indeed, his father had forgiven and forgotten. It was the best treasure his son could have ever found. (iv)

Often we become slaves to the memory of our past sins, carrying an extra burden of guilt around with us, forgetting the forgiveness already ours in Christ Jesus. We're too much like the man walking along the road, stooped over with a heavy sack slung upon his shoulder. Someone comes along driving a horse and wagon and offers the man a ride, which he gladly accepts. A few minutes later the driver turns around to see if his passenger is comfortable, and is surprised to see him standing in the wagon with the heavy sack still upon his shoulder. The astonished driver remarks, "Why not put down your load and let the horse and wagon do the work? The wagon's going to carry the sack anyway." (v) God's forgiveness is already ours. Accept it and put down your load of guilt.

Finally, why should we forgive others? There are many reason why we should, but we'll look briefly just at two today. First, we should forgive because forgiveness may be the neglected path to happiness. Fractured relationships are part of too many of our lives. A falling out has taken place, a difference of opinion, a hurtful remark or incident, or a combination of negative things, and before we know it, a twenty foot high fence is between us - called estrangement. People who have been lovers, relatives, or friends, now act as if strangers. Forgiveness may be the way around the fence of estrangement, the path to reconciliation and happiness, but it's a neglected path. It's neglected because one person has to take the initiative, and we've got our pride, don't we? And it's risky, because let's face it, forgiveness does not always result in reconciliation. Love does not always win, yet it often does. And anger and guilt seldom win. I think the risk of forgiving is worth it. (vi)

Second, we should work hard at forgiving others because God has already forgiven us so much. This is the point of Jesus' parable about the unforgiving servant. The king forgives the debt of a servant that is hundreds of thousands of dollars; then the same servant turns around and tosses in jail someone who owes him twenty bucks. The contrast between the two is ridiculous, and this is the point. God's forgiveness of you and me overshadows what we may be called upon to forgive in another.

What does it take to forgive? It takes a willingness to be changed, to be transformed. It takes a willingness to remember, not only the wrongs committed against us, but also the wrongs we have committed against others. It takes being willing to remember the many times we have already been forgiven ourselves. It takes being willing to practice, because forgiving another person does not come easily. And, it takes prayer and a willingness to want to forgive as a way to know God better and to understand more fully the forgiveness God freely offers. (vii) Forgiveness unlimited is the model given to us by our loving God in Jesus Christ. May we strive to emulate that in our dealings with others, and seek to live as Jesus taught. Amen.

The Pilgrim Church of Duxbury
Rev. Kenneth C. Landall

i Frederick Buechner, Peculiar Treasures, p. 78.
ii The Clergy Journal, 5-6/84, p. 12.
iii Brian Schofield-Bodt, Preaching Word & Witness, 9/11/05.
iv Parables, 3.7.4.
v Pulpit Resource, 9/13/81.
vi The Clergy Journal 5-6/81, pp. 6-7.
vii Schofield-Bodt, op. cit.