May 14, 2006

Role Models

Acts 2:42-47
1 John 5:1-6
John 15:9-17

Happy Mother's Day, mothers! A little boy asks the little girl next door. "I wonder what my mother would like for Mother's Day?" The girl answers: "Well, you could promise to keep your room clean and neat; you could go to bed when she tells you; you could brush your teeth after eating; you could quit fighting with your brother, especially at the dinner table." The boy responds, "No, I mean something practical." (i) At another household, it is after dinner on Mother's Day, and as usual, she is loading the dishes into the dishwasher. Her teenage daughter wanders into the kitchen, and horrified to see her mother at the sink, exclaims, "Mom, you shouldn't do the dishes on Mother's Day!" The mother is touched by her seeming thoughtfulness, and is about to step aside, when the daughter adds, "They'll keep until tomorrow." (ii)

It's good that we set aside a day to honor mothers and the significant roles they play in families and in society. As important as it is that women are now in most areas of the business and professional world, the role that a mother plays in the home, in teaching values to and nurturing her children cannot be underestimated. A woman should never apologize for being "just a mother and homemaker." It is a noble calling. I heard of a woman who had the perfect comeback when asked what she did for a living. She would reply: "I am socializing two homo sapiens in the dominant values of the Judeo-Christian tradition, in order that they might be instruments for the transformation of the social order into the teleologically prescribed utopia inherent in the eschaton. I'm a mother!" (iii) I also greatly admire those women who somehow manage to juggle motherhood and a career outside the home. It's a rare man who can combine his job and being a good father to his children as adroitly as many women seem to be able to do.

Mothers and fathers are indeed important role models for their children. One minister gave his mother the highest compliment. He said, "My mother practices what I preach." (iv) But sometimes, sadly, we parents are not the best role models. Truth is, no mother or father is perfect. We all make mistakes, sometimes big ones, when we really bomb out in being a role model our children can look up to. Who can our children (and the child within each of us) look up to, respect, and emulate? Sports figures seem to be less and less the role models they used to be when some of us were younger. How about public figures like presidents or other politicians? Most of the men who have been U.S. presidents during my lifetime have either had marital infidelities or some other character blight, such as untrustworthiness or outright deceit. Public figures who can be good role models seem few and far between. Ministers and priests used to be considered good role models - but a few bad apples have spoiled the whole bushel for the rest of us. There are at least five ministers I have personally known over the years, each of whom earlier in their ministry was a role model for me, but who, sooner or later, had to leave their churches because of some inappropriate behavior.

Where do we turn for appropriate role models? If parents, public figures, even the clergy, are not without character flaws, to whom can we turn to help us know what is and is not the right way to live our lives? Before we answer this question we need to acknowledge that even those of us who are less than perfect - and that's all of us, of course - even in our brokenness, we can be worthy of emulation, if not entirely, at least in part. Each person, whoever she or he is and whatever she or he has done, has been created in God's image, and all that God creates is good. So the basic person in each of us is good, even if what we have done to that basic personality is somewhat less than good. One of our callings as Christians is to strive to be better persons today than we were yesterday, not forgetting our past or beating ourselves up over what we've done, but building on the past to make a brighter tomorrow for ourselves, for those we care about, and for the world in which we live.

I'll bet you've figured out where I'm heading with this. For the faithful, there are many role models in the Bible, the heroes and heroines of the faith to whom we can look for guidance and inspiration. But all of them, like the role models of today, all, with one exception, had their imperfections and flaws. They were great men and women - Abraham, Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel, Joseph, Moses, Jeremiah, Isaiah, Peter, Paul, and Mary (not the singing group) - the list could go on and on. But there is only one personality in the Bible who we could describe as completely obedient to God's will, and that's the prototype human being - Jesus of Nazareth. Christian doctrine teaches that Jesus was fully divine but also fully human. That's a hard concept to grasp, but an important one in understanding what is expected of us. God was present in Jesus, enabling him to do the things he did, to preach the way he preached, to heal the way he healed, to serve the way he served, to endure suffering the way he suffered. And God is present in you and me also. Not to take anything away from Jesus, but we need to remember that he was fully human as well as fully divine. This means that you and I have the potential to become fully human, and we have the potential to become more Christ-like.

Jesus really is the ideal role model, someone to whom we can confidently look for the right directions in our own lives. But we don't always think we are capable of following him, do we? You and I say, "That's okay for Jesus to do, but I could never do that. Turn the other cheek? Forgive seventy times seven? Love my enemies? Die to myself and all my selfish desires? Give willingly to help the poor and homeless? Feed the hungry and clothe the naked? Endure suffering as he did? Jesus, you've got to be kidding! Get real!" But we know deep inside that he's not kidding; he is serious. How much easier it is to look at our contemporary role models with all their frailties and weaknesses. If we do, then when we stumble ourselves, we can say, "Well, look. The same thing happened to so and so. I guess I'm not really so bad after all." But when Jesus is our role model it's not so easy. The standard is much, much higher. And yet at the same time, Jesus also teaches us about God's tender mercy and bountiful forgiveness, that can be ours through him. He teaches us about responsibility, but also about grace.

When we take our faith seriously, we need to be constantly asking ourselves, "If this situation were happening to Jesus, what would Jesus do?" "What would Jesus say about such and such?" "What have I learned from Jesus that will better help me to do God's will?" Individual Christians and all of us together as the church need to look to Jesus Christ as our role model. The early church described in Acts, obviously much closer to the time of this role model than we are, tried faithfully to follow the way of Jesus in their life together. Perhaps we can pick up a few clues about how we might better live our lives together (and individually), as we see how the early church modeled itself after the Christ.

First, the early church was a learning church, devoted to the apostles' teachings. As individual Christians, if we stop learning, our faith will begin to shrivel and die. Coming to church regularly helps, but also very important is participating in the educational opportunities available in our church. And there's always private religious studies we can do on our own. Second, the early church was a church of fellowship. I think we do a pretty good job in this one. We have a real sense of family here, of community, a caring about one another that is genuine and concrete. But we need to be careful not to become too complacent, just feeling good about ourselves, and nothing more, particularly important in the interim time ahead. Third, it was a praying church. We do fairly well here also, but we could do better. Most of our church meetings begin and end with prayer, but do we really rely on God's strength, guidance, and presence as much as we should? Do we really think about what the words mean when we're praying the Lord's Prayer, for example? Do we pray for others as well as ourselves anytime other than Sunday mornings? Things to think about.

Fourth, it was a church where things were happening. Signs and wonders were there. What signs and wonders are present here? Lots of things are going on in our church, lots of things are happening, but are they to the glory of God? Perhaps even greater things could be happening if we truly believed that God and we together could make them happen. (v) Fifth, it was a sharing church. The early Christians had a deep feeling of responsibility, not only for each other, but also for others in need, for example, widows, orphans, those imprisoned, etc. What we do through Our Church's Wider Mission efforts, locally and through our Conference to those beyond here, and all of our hands-on outreach, is an indication that we're moving in the right direction. But we need to keep up our efforts.

Finally, the early church was a worshipping church and one that also generated much goodwill among those with whom they came in contact. Worship together here on Sunday mornings (and Saturday nights) is the most important thing we do as a church family. Please, make this a high priority for you and your family, especially in the interim time ahead. Are we a church that others also feel good about? Yes, I think so, and I thank God that we are! When I visit newcomers to our church, I hear over and over again, "What a friendly church." My friendly friends, keep up the good work!

There are other criteria for modeling ourselves after the role model of Jesus, but these are good ones to start with. I think our church fares pretty well, but of course, we could always do better. Overarching all of these criteria, though, is the commandment of Jesus described in our Gospel lesson, that we love one another as he has loved us. This is not a romantic notion of love, but rather, a self-giving kind, where one extends one's self for the purpose of nurturing another one's growth. (vi) We look to Jesus as the prime example and model of such self-giving love.

If we continue to keep Jesus as our role model, then I am confident that our church will continue to be blessed, and individually, we also will be blessed. Jesus said, "I came that all may have life, and have it abundantly." May each of us live that abundant life as best we can, following our role model Jesus, and then indeed we will be a blessing, not only to our children, but to all the world. Amen.

The Pilgrim Church of Duxbury
Rev. Kenneth C. Landall

i Pastor's Story File, 31.1.
ii Ibid., 31.4.
iii Ibid., 19.4.
iv Ibid., 19.8.
v William Barclay, Daily Study Bible, Acts, pp. 30-31.
vi M. Scott Peck, "The Road Less Traveled," p. 81.